'She told him not to be late': Grief runs deep as families struggle after Air India plane crash

Eleven days after the crash of London-bound AI 171 in Ahmedabad, families of the victims continue to battle intense grief, with many displaying unexpected and worrying responses to trauma, according to a report in the Times of India. Counsellors deployed at the Civil Hospital say the emotional toll has been severe, with some individuals showing signs of deep psychological distress.

One of the most distressing cases is that of a 27-year-old man who lost his wife in the tragedy. The couple had married in 2024 and had travelled ahead to London to set up their new life together. Since the crash, he has not shed a single tear. “I should have been with her,” he keeps repeating, struggling to cope with the loss. His wife had asked him not to delay and to reach London’s Gatwick Airport on time. “So, when he received news of the crash, he took the first available flight and came to Ahmedabad, blaming himself for being late,” said a counsellor at Civil Hospital, Ahmedabad. “He came to the hospital campus for three days to complete formalities and take her remains for the last rites. He did not cry - he couldn’t cry even once.”

To support grieving families, Civil Hospital has deployed 10 counsellors, mainly experienced psychiatrists, to help navigate the mental toll of the tragedy.

Urvika Parekh, one of the counsellors, recalled the difficulty of breaking the news to a seven-year-old girl who lost family in the crash. “The family could not tell her,” she said. “Some families have lost multiple members. The void is hard to fill.”

Many families have yet to return home. One elderly man who lost four relatives is now staying with extended family, unable to cope with the silence that greets him at home. “The emotional response has changed over these 11 days,” Parekh said. “We had to discourage some parents from seeing their children one last time because of the condition of the remains.”

Psychiatrist Disha Vasavada, also part of the counselling team, noted the profound difficulty faced by those who lost children. “It is tougher to cope with the loss of a child than a parent,” she told ToI. “In many instances, it may take days or even weeks for the trauma to fully register.”

Vasavada added that while some relatives appeared composed initially, many broke down when the coffins were handed over. “The first few days were filled with arrangements. It’s when that rush is over that the reality sinks in. That’s when hand-holding is needed,” she said.

The psychiatrists likened the psychological toll to early COVID-19 deaths, when families were unable to say goodbye or view the deceased, disrupting the process of closure.

Hospital superintendent Dr. Rakesh Joshi confirmed that the counselling team has been on-site from day one. “They’ve been helping with DNA sampling, identification, and handing over of remains. They will continue to stay until the last body is handed over,” Joshi said.

With inputs from ToI